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[kyrr]

crystal • notes • drop in • etc!
( bear in mind she is unable to speak! )

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[villieldr]

( Well. She's not sure what to make of that.

So she heads to Tofa's room after she reads that, note still in hand as she knocks on her little sister's door 8| )

[kyrr]

[ It takes her a moment, coming to the door and opening it. There's only one person who would come knocking, so she is not surprised to see her sister standing before her. With careful hands, she motions, ushering her in. ]

Welcome.

[villieldr]

( A little nod, and as she steps forward, she holds Tofa's knife out in offering - handle towards Tofa, holding the blade between her fingers. The raised eyebrow might serve for a silent question, easy enough for one so familiar to discern.

Are you upset? Or, at least, you okay? )

[kyrr]

[ She takes the knife and places it to one side, dropped on the table before she pauses. It takes her a moment, fingers flexing absently, but then she begins to sign.

You will never come home. ]

[villieldr]

( Oh.

A frown, with that. Magni pauses, the uncertainty leaning towards displeasure effectively diffused. She almost begins to sign, but stops, makes herself say it out loud. )

I will. Lakshmi is... a wanderer. I will be of Talonhold, and so will she.

( They haven't discussed it explicitly, but she understands her lady well enough to grasp that. Lakshmi cannot be by her side always. )

[kyrr]

[ Tofa frowns, watching her sister for a moment. Slowly, she walks over to the bed and sits, cross-legged, looking up at Magni before she moves her fingers again, slowly and carefully.

She is your home now. The heart is the home. You will go to many places with her and I will miss you dearly.

It is not Magni's fault; Tofa is glad that she has someone to love. There's a longing inside of her for something similar, but she knows she cannot claim that for herself. It is beyond her, scarred as she is.

You will have such happiness. ]

[villieldr]

[villieldr]

( Magni shakes her head, stubborn, and moves to kneel on the floor, not far from where Tofa sits on the bed. )

She is my heart. That doesn't mean— that you will lose me. It doesn't mean I'm not of Talonhold.

( A horrifying, jarring thought, one that make make her stomach churn. To be lost to Talonhold was not something she could think on easily. Lakshmi had no Hold, and so she was of Talonhold. Wanderers they may be, but even so. )

[kyrr]

[ A soft noise in the back of her throat - what might have been a laugh, once.

You will always have Talonhold. It will wait for you to visit. But you shall always have her, too. Your heart. Your wife? ]

[villieldr]

( Magni tilts her head to the side, a little confused, unsure. Like she is treading on uncertain ground. Having to articulate, to speak, is still something that is more difficult than she'd like, when it comes to many things. Some things are so simple, but when the words matter they become so much harder to sculpt. )

It sounds as though— you expect that I will put her before all else. And— in some ways, yes. But she knows the value of home and family as well as I. She knows what Talonhold means to me. Having her does not eclipse home or family. They are—

( A silent, confused gesture, as she tries to grasp for words. )

[kyrr]

[ It is hard for Tofa too and she's frustrated - she doesn't have the right words, not when her hands feel thick and heavy, and she is desperate for her tongue. She is desperate for something to give her an anchor, to help her organise herself so that she can speak properly and truly share what she needs to.

It is not enough, and she grits her teeth.

I will look for your return with each sunrise, sister. ]

[villieldr]

( The assumption of her absence makes sense. It is entirely justified based on the past few years, all her wandering and learning. Even so, the look she casts Tofa is wounded. )

And I— ( A gesture from her heart towards Tofa. )

[kyrr]

[ Tofa frowns, suddenly feeling a pang, and she shakes her head, reaching for Magni's hands to touch their fingers before she signs.

I did not mean to give you sadness. ]

[villieldr]

( Gently, Magni sets a hand on Tofa's shoulder. Reassurance, of a sort, as she tries to shepherd her words around and figure out what to say. )

Wanting to... be the most for Talonhold I can. That is why I have been parted from it.

( The Hold matters to her more than she can easily say. )

[kyrr]

[ I know.

Tofa brings Magni's fingers to her lips, leaving a kiss there.

I have always been proud of you. ]

[villieldr]

( Her smile wavers for a moment, before she wraps her arms around her sister to wrap her in a hug. )

And me, of you.

[kyrr]

[ She leans into the embrace, squeezing Magni tight for a moment before she leans back so she can speak.

What is it like, to be so in love? ]

[villieldr]

( What is it like? The question makes her still, caught for a moment in the vastness of the question. How to describe a feeling, let alone one so complex? How to comprehend it, even, when so much of the world felt beyond her understanding? To not know was something she was at peace at, something she had long accepted and even found comfort in. To want to know all things seemed a quick path to corruption, and to danger. Love, though, the knowledge of that, even if she could not hope to understand it in full or explain its mysteries, that felt like a redemption.

A slow breath. )

You know... in the winter, when the snow grasps harder, and even the Hold Owl's feathers are ruffled up to keep warm? And... you know that it is cold, and that you are cold, but you keep moving, because...

( Because that is the war of the Avvar. They embrace the cold, they are resilient in the face of it. Harsh winters have bred a strong people. To say they survive the cold would undercut how much the mountain and its elements are part of who they are. )

I think love is like... when you feel the warmth of the fire. Bright and... and you begin to feel all of yourself again, and you realise that the cold had made parts of you numb without you realising.

( A little smile, bashful, as she ducks her head. )

[kyrr]

[ For a long moment, all Tofa can do is stare at her sister.

This is not something she had been willing to consider, at least not before now. She had never imagined either of them falling in love, either of them being anything like this, but seeing Magni so content, so happy... How can she feel anything but joy? How can she let herself feel anything but a sheer, embracing contentment? It's impossible and she knows it.

She is so happy for her dearest and most wonderful sister.

Leaning forward, she rests her head on her sister's before she leans back to sign, fingers slow and careful.

It sounds very beautiful. A feeling she would like to steal, if she was able. You are brighter for it, fierce one. Brighter and beautiful. She is good. ]

[villieldr]

She is.

( Gently - gently, for all that her sister is strong, of the mountains, with the same stone and gales in her bones - she rests her hands on Tofa's shoulders. )

You don't— need love to be bright and beautiful, Tofa. You are already the brightest star of Talonhold.

( Her sister did not realise it, she thought, how wonderful she was, how much better Magni was for having family here, how lucky Talonhold was to have her wit and her strength. That insight and compassion, the will and resilience, and all that before looking to her skill as a ranger. )

But if you... wish for it, then I know you'll find someone worthy of you.

[kyrr]

[ The brightest star - that cannot be possible. With all the things she had seen, all the people in their Hold... She is the moon; a mere reflection of the brightness there.

She does not have the heart to argue, however, smiling instead.

Only as bright as my dear sister. Her expression is incredibly soft.

My heart is well. I do not need to demand more than what I have.

Which is... Not entirely a lie. ]